Fun says, "When brains are no more."

When brains are no more, what do we use to think? It makes me wonder, which is a sadder case? Having a brain and not using it? Or not having a brain yet thinking and knowing too much?

Fun says, "My Comic - Later? Sure."

Cinta the Clueless Lover: Oh, Suram, you don't love me anymore, I can't live without you.

Suram the Goth: Get over it. We never even dated.

Cinta the Clueless Lover: If you leave me now I will jump off this building.

Suram the Goth: Huh? What did you say? I'm busy I need to go. I'll catch you later. (Suram the Goth left the scene.)

Cinta the Clueless Lover: He said he will catch me! That's so romantic! Then I should jump and let him be my hero.

Piuuuuuuuuu....splat!!!

Written on the pool of blood: You are really late in catching me!

Fun says, "My Comic - Ubahikan's Lamentation."

Ubahikan the Modifisher: *sigh* Life is so tough...I am inproductive, disproductive, unproductive, misproductive, deproductive, abproductive, malproductive and many more but never reproductive...

Ubahikan the Modifisher silently walks out of the screen, feeling down and sad and lonely...



Modifish Dictionary:
Inproductive: (Adj) Trying in vain to produce something unproductive.
Disproductive: (Adj) Causing others not to produce.
Unproductive: (Adj) Not producing.
Misproductive: (Adj) Producing wrong products.
Deproductive: (Adj) Causing something productive to be misproductive.
Abproductive: (Adj) Producing defective and harmful products that seem to be productive.
Malproductive: (Adj) Inability to produce the right product due to wrong raw materials.
Reproductive: (Adj) Something to do with babies. I think you understand it better than me.

Fun says, "My Comic - Ad - Caveman Service."

Have problems with your high-tech gadgets? Need help to fix them? Gua the Caveman can help you. Call 1-800-1234-CAVE for instant help.*#

*Terms and conditions apply.
#Please copy and paste to your notepad if you cannot understand caveman language.

范说:"故事 - 富有的代价."

从前，有一个贫穷的打工仔。他每天需要四点起身，吃了早餐就要立刻赶去橡胶园割胶。到七点钟，他得把割来的橡胶运到工厂去。然后，他就会到一家电子工厂里干活直到下午六点才收工。他这样一天的工作赚来的钱，只是刚好足够来养活他的一家五口。
Once upon a time, there lived a poor worker. He had to wake up at 4am everyday and rush to a rubber estate after breakfast. At 7am, he had to send all the latex collected to a factory. Then, he went to an electronic factory to work until 6pm. One full day's work could only yield him enough to feed his family of five.

他有一个好漂亮的太太。这太太为他生下了三个可爱的小孩子。虽然生活很贫困，太太却一句怨言都没有。每天她都很努力的把家务干好，煮了一餐美味可口的晚餐等待先生的回归。
He had a very pretty wife. This wife gave birth to three cute children for him. Although live was very difficult, she never complained. She worked hard everyday to do all the household chores and then waited for her husband's return with delicious dinners she prepared everyday.

这打工仔每天这么看着他太太，一直都觉得很伤心。他觉得自卑，因为没有办法给他美丽的太太荣华富贵的生活。
This worker looked at his wife everyday, feeling very sad. He felt inferior because he could not give her beautiful wife the type of luxurious life she deserved.

有一天，他忍不住了！他对太太说：“亲爱的老婆，我不能让你过着这样辛苦的日子。”
One day, he could stand no more! He said to his wife, "Dear sweetheart, I cannot let you live your life in such difficulties."

太太满脸笑容的回答说：“老公，我一点都不觉得辛苦。和你在一起，最幸福了！”
The wife replied with a smile, "Honey, I don't feel difficult at all. Being with you, is the most happy thing to me!"

打工仔却很严肃地说：“我决定了！”
The worker replied strictly, "I've decided!"

当天，打工仔就把太太和三个孩子给卖掉了。他心里说：“我先把他们卖了，把得来的钱拿去投资。成为富翁了，再把他们赎回来。”
That day, the worker sold his wife and three little children. He said in his heart, "I'll sell them off first, then using the money I got to invest. After I become a millionaire, I will come back and buy them back."

打工仔很开心地把钱拿了就跑去投资，一投就投了五年。
The worker happilly took the money to invest, taking five years.

五年后，他不再是打工仔。他已成为大富翁。这时，他想起五年前卖掉的太太与孩子。于是，他拿着一大笔钱去找他的太太。
After five years, he was no longer a worker. He became a millionaire. At this time, he remembered his wife and children whom he sold five years ago. So, he took a large amount of money to go find his wife.

见到她时，他很惊讶，因为他当年婀娜多姿的太太被人糟蹋得不在迷人了。他见了，不禁掉了眼泪，很心疼。
When he saw her, he was shocked, because his lovely wife was no longer lovely due to the sufferings she endured. After he saw, he couldn't help but teared, feeling so heartbroken.

把太太赎了，他就带着她去找他们的三个孩子。可是，惨不忍睹的，他三个孩子竟然被砍了双腿，被逼去乞吃。太太看了说不出话，只是呆呆得站在那儿。
After buying back his wife, he took her to find their three children. However, to the horror of his life, his three children lost their legs and forced to beg for money.

结果，这个从打工仔变成大富翁的人就这样一家五口，过着富贵却伤心的生活...
At the end, this worker who became a millionaire lived the rest of his life in his family of five, living rich but sad life...

Fun says, "My Comic - Gua the Caveman AKA Gua the Tech-Savvy Caveman."

Suram the (Cloud of Ionized Poisonous) Goth: Biz, biz...

Innocent Passerby: Gaa. Ick!...I...I...caaannttt......brrrr....brrr....eah....hhhed....Ick....Ack...

Suram the (Cloud of Ionized Poisonous) Goth: Biz, biz...

Hantu the (Field of Rainbow Coloured Electric) Ghost: Zap, zap...

Unsuspecting Passerby: Aaaaahhhhhhh!!! (only dust is left...)

Hantu the (Field of Rainbow Coloured Electric) Ghost: Zap, zap...

Gua the Caveman: Bang! Bang! (as he fires his naturaliser) Back to normal both of you!

Suram the Ghost: Yikes, what happened? Yikes! Why I can't see myself?

Hantu the Goth: Wow, I materialized! Weeeeeee!!!

Gua the Caveman: Oops, I pressed the wrong button.

Suram the Ghost: Change me back to my body!!!

Hantu the Goth: Raa!!! I'll kill you!

Gua the Caveman: Yikes! Press escape!

Suram the Ghost & Hantu the Goth: (*Blink* *Blink*) Where did he go? (*Blink* *Blink*)

Fun says, "My Comic - The Terror Continues."

At one side of Cuckooland...
Suram the Goth: Muahaha! It's so nice scaring people to their death!

Innocent Citizens: Gaa!!! Run!!! Gaa!!! For!!! Gaa!!! Your!!! Gaa!!! Life!!! Gaa!!!

Suram the Goth: Boo!

Innocent Citizens: Ack! (Cardiac arrest...)...*Cough...Ek!...

At the other side of Cuckooland...
Hantu the Ghost: Weeeeeeeeeeeee... (bouncing around...)

Innocent Citizens: GAAaaaaAAaaaAAAAAAaaaaaAAAAA.....(Spinning around, trying to keep Hantu the Ghost in view)

Hantu the Ghost: :P

Innocent Citizens: (Pee on pants and start foaming in the mouths...)

And in the middle of Cuckooland...
Suram the Goth and Hantu the Ghost: (turn around and face each other)

Suram the Goth and Hantu the Ghost: Yikes!!!

Suram the Goth ionized into a cloud of poisonous ions due to the fear of Hantu the Ghost while Hantu the Ghost turned into a rainbow coloured electrical field that zaps all unsuspecting passerbies due to the eeriness of Suram the Goth.

Fun says, "Prime Time Fun Flash."

Good day. This will be a brief news as our all famous country, Cuckooland, falls into turmoil.

For some unknown reason, Suram the Goth started to terrorize the nation, causing fear and chaos in the nation. Hantu the Ghost saw that it was fun and he joined in the turmoil early in the afternoon. People are dying out on the streets due heart attacks. Some poorer dudes froze into stones. Some even poorer Cuckoolanders demoleculized into arrays of atoms zooming randomly all over the country, trying to run away from the gothic terror of Suram the Goth and killing many more people in the process.

Due to serious fear of attack in the news center, our news shall end here See you again in the next session of Prime Time Fun Flash.

Fun says, "My Comic - Hobby is Modifishing."

Ubahikan the Modifisher: Hey, you are ghost! You don't get tired, right? What you do to kill time?

Hantu the Ghost: Nothing much, just hovering around aimlessly. How about you? How do you kill time?

Ubahikan the Modifisher: I Modifish whenever I am free.

Hantu the Ghost: What is Modifish?

Ubahikan the Modifisher: Don't you know? It's the hippest thing in town!

Hantu the Ghost: No, I don't know. Is it something to do with tearing a fish apart to steal it's soul?

Ubahikan the Modifisher: You are so minimic! You don't even understand a thing!

Hantu the Ghost: What nemanic?

Ubahikan the Modifisher: Minimic!!! Argh!

Hantu the Ghost: Gaa!!!

(Weirdly, Hantu the ghost was scared away by Ubahikan the Modifisher's scream...)

P/S:
Minimic
Origin: Unknown. Most probably from a kindergarten kid who mispelled mimic.

Meaning: (adjective) idiotic, ignorant or oblivious.
Meaning: (adjective) being in a state of poor mimicry.
Meaning: (adjective) blind to hips and hops.
Meaning: (adjective) Pride, ego and stupidity all in one.

范说:"彭羚的让我跟你走:'如若你肯靠紧我 你愿疼惜我 未悔当初.'"

哭了一整天，如果始终还是如果。如果你肯...

Fun says, "My Comic - Cluelessly in Love."

Cinta the Clueless Lover: Oh, look at Suram the Goth, he is so HANDSOME!

Debit & Kredit the Twin Accountants: Ya, ya. I agree. Agree.

Cinta the Clueless Lover: But he already has a dozen of girlfriends. I don't even know if he notices me.

Jujur the Honest: I don't think you should love him. He is such a womaniser!

Cinta the Clueless Lover: But he is so attractively irresistable!

Gila the Crackpot: Then just go ahead and love him and get hurt. Wee!!! (Jumping around excitingly)

Cinta the Clueless Lover: But I am afraid of getting hurt... :(

Jangka the Predictor: Thou shall not love, for thou art an idiot!

*Whack* *whack* *whack*...

Jangka the Predictor got whacked until he became a 猪头饼...

Fun says, "My Comic -"

Pandai the Genius: Oh, I'm such a genius, I know so many things!

Suram the Goth: But you do not know how to not be afraid of me. Boo! Muahaha!

Pandai the Genius: (Difficulty in breathing, pain in chest, approaching heart attack...)

Bunyi the Soundologist: Stop it! You are going to kill him. Let me cure him first. Beep. Beep. Bup beep.

Jujur the Honest: You might know many things but learning is a life long process. We must learn everyday.

Cinta the Clueless Lover: Yes, I learned a lot everyday from my heartbreaking experiences. Yet the more I learn, the less I am able to find true love! (Crying and wailing like crazy, running around the room...)

Pandai the Genius: Ironic, isn't it? The more we learn the less we seem to know, that's why I never learn, I just know.

Ubahikan the Modifisher: Ya, learning makes us feel so nano-y!

Pandai the Genius: Nano-y? ><"

Fun says, "My Comic - The Legend of Modifish."

Once upon a time, in a secluded village of Cuckooland, there was a pair of lovely couple. They live just like any other couples until one day, when the wife was in labour, giving birth to their first and only child.

Wife: Argh, it's painful! I'm so gonna reward myself with a feast of fishes after this.

Husband: Oh dear. I can't bear seeing you in such pain. I shall go get you your feast of fishes.

Midwife: Ok, stop talking and start pushing! PUSH!

Then the husband left to catch a variety of fishes for his wife. Then he left the fishes on the kitchen table and went back to see if his wife has successfully given birth.

Baby: Wua wua wua!!!

Midwife: Congratulation! That's a boy, a cute boy.

Husband: Yippie!

Wife: Dear, can you please go cook for me?

The husband nodded and left for the kitchen.

Husband: Gaa!!! The fishes has changed! These are not the fishes I caught!

Midwife: *Gasp! The coming of your son has modified the fishes!

Wife: Then we shall call our son, Ubahikan the Modifisher!

And this is how, Modifish came into existence. Since then, Ubahikan the Modifisher can't stop Modifishing in his private Modifishery.

Fun says, "It's Friday and I am still Modifishing!!!"

Here's an inconcise and outrageous definition for the word Modifish:

(noun): Modified English
Example: I speak Modifish as good as English.

(noun): A breed of fish found in Cuckooland. Modifish is only available for catching on Thursdays and weekends.
Example: Modifish is tasty when you leave it to rot until Wednesday.

(verb): Creating new words creatively.
Example: I am modifishing now at this moment, on this blog entry.

(verb): The act of catching modifish.
Example: It's Friday and I am still Modifishing!!!

Derivation:
Modifishation: (Noun) The process to Modifish.
Example: After Modifishation, John can now speak more fluently.

Modifishingly: (Adjective) In a modified way.
Example: Yasmine Modifishingly drove her way to Modifish during last weekend.

Modifishery: (Noun) A place where Modifish is reared for people to Modifish.
Example: I went to the Modifishery hoping to Modifish but the place was closed due to Modifishation.

Modifished: (Adjective) Seriously modified, usually in a weird way.
Example: You Modifished your boss' car? You are so Modifished.

Stay tune for more of our Modifished inconcise and outrageous translation of Modifish to English.

Fun says, "Prime Time Fun Flash - World Superhero Day."

Good evening. Welcome to Prime Time Fun Flash where all the news are flashy and fun.

Today, being the World Superhero Day, we've sent out our crews all across the nation to interview famous people to know about their views on superheroes. But before that, let's have a brief introduction of this World Superhero Day.

World Superhero Day is a festive that falls randomly on any date from 1st January till 31st December every year. No one can predict it's coming. It is just suddenly there one day and the people just celebrate. And what do we celebrate? We celebrate the glory and stupidity of our superheroes such as those who are great in saving lives but do not know how to wear their clothes in proper order. And this gives us inspiration to be like them, glorious but stupid. In another word, NOTORIOUS!

Now, let's go to our crew and see what they've got.

News crew: Good evening! Here, we have a group of people from Cuckooland.

From background: (Loud cheers!!!)

News crew: Let's have a look at our pre-recorded interview on what these people want as their super power.

(Flash...)

Suram the Goth: I want the power to be able to freak the whole world out with my scariness. Muahaha!

(Flash...)

Pandai the Genius: I want the power to make people become stupider. (Sly smile)

(Flash...)

Hantu the Ghost: Power? I have too many powers. For Abu's sake, I am a ghost! Duh!

News crew: ><"

(Flash...)

Abang the Brother: I want the power to make all the people my siblings. Yippie, a hapyp world filled with love! But then, everyone will be doing incest! Yikes!

(Flash...)

Bunyi the Soundologist: I don't want super power. I just want that last key to solving my last hurdle to creating the cancer-treating music.

(Flash...)

Cinta the Clueless Lover: I want the power to make guys fall in love with me. I never had a relationship before...waaa...waaa (crying so loud that the earth shook)

(Flash...)

Gila the Crackpot: Well, of course I wanted the power to crack pots at one look. That's my hobby.

(And there it was, the lense of the camera cracked...)

(Flash...)

Underlings: We want the power to overthrow our ironfist torturer!!!

(Flash...)

Dera the Torturer: I want the power to torture!!! Torture!!! Muahaha!!!

(Flash...)

200 plus students: We just want to pass our exams.

(Flash...)

Tulis the Scribbler: I'd love to have the power to scribble everything I want in a blink.

(Flash...)

Pengutus the Cuckooed Prophet: Powers? Haha, I am a prophet! What other powers are there that is greater than prophethood?

News crew: I don't know. Maybe there might be something else that you want.

Pengutus the Cuckooed Prophet: *Gasp!!! I saw a black mass. Dark and travelling at high velocity. It brings imminent doom! Gaa!!! Too dark!!!

News crew: What are you talking about?

Pengutus the Cuckooed Prophet: It is falling! Death! Gaa!!!

(*Splat! There goes the news crew...)

(Flash...)

Oops. Sorry for that violent scene. That's all for today's Fun Flash. See you again, next random day. Good night.

Fun says, "My Comic - The Great Teacher?"

Setting: Pandai the Genius giving a lecture on cuckoo behaviour to some 200 plus students in the Technology University of Cuckooland (TUC).

Somewhere in the middle of the class...

Pandai the Genius: Being cuckooed means...?

200 plus students: ...

Pandai the Genius: I know you know the answer. Come on, you there at the back. Cuckooness is what?

Pointed student: ...crazy?

Pandai the Genius: Nonono!!! Wrong! You there, the one with green and red strips. What is the meaning of being a cuckoo?

Green and red strip student: Insane?...Maybe burned a fuse or two?

Pandai the Genius: You idiot! That's not the meaning. The word relates to something. Something you all are very familiar with. What is it?

200 plus students: ...

Pandai the Genius: Come on, you are not that stupid. You know the answer.

200 plus students: Do you think we can read minds? How do we know what you want?

Pandai the Genius: The meaning! Come on. Tell me the meaning!

Gila the Crackpot: The meaning is you are a cuckoo! 200 students not understanding you doesn't mean they are all idiots. It means you are a poor communicator. You cuckoo!

200 plus students: (Claps, thunderous claps...)

Pandai the Genius could not take the humiliation and blew the whole building into smithereens with his explosive brain.

Fun says, "Why why why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Why do some people seem to have all the happy moments whenever they are together, while others suffer from the very first day they are together?

Why do some people get physical within days into a relationship while others couldn't even get a "I like you" although they are weeks into a relationship?

Why do some people communicate so well with their partners while others kept being misunderstood?

Pathetic, isn't it for the latter ones?...

But it is still debatable as to who will be the winners at the end. We shall wait and see...

Fun says, "My Comic - Introducing Gila."

The setting: In a chinaware shop.

(Crack, Prang, Prang, Crack, Prang, Crack, Crack,...)

Shopowner: What do you think you are doing!!!

Gila the Crackpot: Cracking pots. What else do you think I am doing?

Shopowner: #$%@%!@%!!! You @!#$!@#$!@#!!!

Gila the Crackpot: Why are you so angry? Why do they call me Gila the Crackpot if I don't crack some pots?

Shopowner: (Got a stroke from being overly angry...)

Gila the Crackpot: Serves you right for not knowing I am Gila the Crackpot.

Fun says, "Air Supply's All Out of Love, 'Please love me or I'll be gone, I'll be gone.'"

When love arrives, some people grab it like precious diamonds while others let it slip away.

Those who grab, love like their very being depends on it. They appreciate the love they found. Giving is the only thing they do, loving blindly.

Those who let it slip, stood there admiring the beauty of love but just won't have a slice themselves. And when it is all over, they lament that they don't have any love.

I love you and I grab my love. But do you love me? Please love me or I'll be gone...

Fun says, "My Comic - Complex Relationship."

Air the Venus: Api! I am so stressed!!! Please help me!!!

Api the Martian: Oh, what do you want me to help you on?

Air the Venus: Just help me?

Api the Martian: Exactly what do you expect me to do?

Air the Venus: @#"$&!#$&*!& Are you an idiot!!! Just HELP me!!!!

Api the Martian: ><"...I do not know what you want...I might as well go play a round or two of golf...

(And there this started the first universal war...)